If Only
by tardisa
Summary: Alternate Scene to Before The Dawn – If Babs had followed Dick, Cassie & M'gann in the bioship. Somebody (OC) sees her off & Dick gets jealous / Oneshot


Disclaimer: I do not own Young Justice

Summary: An alternate scene to Before The Dawn - If Babs had followed Dick, Cassie & M'gann in the bioship. Someone goes to see her off and Dick gets jealous

I had a dream the other night and I was inspired to write this short story

_This is my first fanfic and I am open to any constructive criticism :)_

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**If Only**

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**Star City**

**March 30, 20:21 PDT**

"Are you sure Tim and Karen will be fine on their own?" Babs asks. She glances at me, giving a look, a mix of concern and guilt. "What if this doesn't go according to plan? It's extremely dangerous, not that the other missions aren't but I feel bad for leaving them behind."

"They'll be fine," I reply. "As long as everyone stays whelmed, everything will go smoothly and we'll manage to find Lagoon Boy and the others."

Initially, we planned for Babs to go along with Tim and Karen to pose as captives. But I soon learnt from Artemis that there were a limited supply of containment pods and chances are that either one of them wouldn't make it on to God knows where. So instead, she's joining Cassie, M'gann and I in the bioship. It took some convincing and lies but she agreed eventually. I claimed that younger teenagers were the targets. Don't get me wrong, I care about Tim and Karen's safety but I couldn't stand the thought of Babs getting left behind with any of Manta's troopers. I know she's tough and she can defend herself but _if_ anything happened to her, I don't think I could ever forgive myself.

"Star City's docking bay should be safe right? Nobody there yet?" She adds to which I nod in reply. Since Kaldur and Artemis blew up the cave, we had no other choice but to meet the others there.

We walk to the docking bay in a comfortable silence. My hand brushes against hers and immediately, a rush travels through me. I instantly feel the need to stop and take a good look at her. She stares back at me in confusion. That's when I realise I'm shivering. I find this contrast funny. It's odd having adrenaline rushing through your body and at the same time, be so cold on the outside. The air between us is thick, not because of the humidity. It's so quiet that you can literally hear a pin drop. I'm also aware of my heart rate picking up and the fluttering butterflies in my stomach. And now there's this strong urge to hold her hand, I'm not sure how to explain it but doing so, it'll feel right. Her touch gives me the sense of comfort, security and contentment. I'm left longing for it.

"Dick?" Babs whispers. I'm not quite sure why she's whispering but all I notice are her features. Her beautiful deep blue eyes that sparkle under the moonlight and she absentmindedly licks her lips. She looks absolutely graceful. "Dick?" She repeats. Crap, how long have I been staring at her? Our eyes are drawn towards one another. The next few seconds go by slowly and all of a sudden, I'm brushing her hair. She shuts her eyes, takes a deep breath and pushes my hand away, "Dick, no stop. I can't do this."

"Babs, I-"

"Dick, no. I can't. This isn't right," She whispers. "I mean, you can't just do that! I'm with Tobias, I'm sorry." I frown, what was I thinking? Did I honestly think she'd leave him for me?

I wish things could be simpler between us. Babs has been seeing a guy named Tobias for a few months. She's happy with him and I guess I should be happy for her; after all he does treat her nicely. I can't help it though, especially since he reminds me a little of myself. The way we play things off and our carefree nature. It hurts to know that I'm the type of guy Babs would want but timing's an issue.

"Babs! There you are, I was looking for you!" We hear someone shout from the other end of the deck. The familiar voice makes me cringe. We both turn around to find a brunette male waving enthusiastically at us. His green eyes gleaming as he walks towards us.

"What's he doing here?" I mutter. Babs raises an eyebrow. I know that Tobias is aware of the team; he's been providing weaponry for us for the past 2 years. I'm more surprised by his presence; I didn't inform him we would be here but it's pretty obvious Babs did.

"Hey Nightwing," Tobias greets. I smile in return because I don't want to be rude. "What are you guys doing just standing around? Come on, let's get a move on!" It would be much easier to hate him if he didn't remind me so much of myself. Actually, that should make me hate him more. But it's not like he did anything wrong. All of this is my fault. Apparently, he's had a thing for her ever since they met and only mustered the courage to ask her out a few months ago. Yeah, sounds a lot like me.

We reach the meeting point and I can't get over how awkward it is between the three of us. I nearly professed my feelings for Babs, she rejected me anyway and Tobias joins us in a matter of seconds. I feel sick to my stomach and my head is throbbing. What's taking M'gann and Cassie so long? Ironically, they're usually the first few to get ready for missions. So much for being early birds.

I need to neglect these feelings, ignore them and replace them with safe platonic ones. I've tried so hard to put them away but every time I think they're gone for good, she does something and they come back stronger than ever. It gets more difficult each time. Even when I was with Zatanna, the idea of being with Babs was at the back of my mind. I can't let this go on for any longer. Besides, it's not safe to date team members. That'll only end up putting a bigger target on our backs. I learnt that the hard way.

"Oh my goodness! Sorry we're late! Are Black Manta's troopers here? What about the captives?" Cassie stammers. Before anyone can say something, Cassie goes on. "I'm so so sorry! Well, obviously M'gann is too. The zeta beams weren't functioning properly and-"

"Wondergirl! It's fine." Babs responds. Tobias and I heave a sigh of relief. If no one had stopped her, she would've gone off for a very long time.

"Alright then, we should get going. Don't want to get caught by any troopers," I announce. "Miss M, is the bioship ready?"

_"Yes. Psychic link now established as well."_

"Great, don't think we need it now though," I say out loud. "Now, we wait in the bioship." Cassie, M'gann and I enter the ship. Babs doesn't join us, perhaps she's saying bye to Tobias. Inside, I do a quick run through about the objectives of the mission. This takes about three minutes and Babs still hasn't joined us. I find this unusual and I decide to step out and look for her.

"Bye Tobias," She mumbles.

"Bye. Be safe, promise me that." He replies to which she nods. They haven't even noticed me here. That's when I realise they're leaning in to each other. I'm not really sure what's happening, I don't want to know. My mind's shaky and I'm rooted to the ground. I'm trying to convince myself that they're not going to kiss. I see them close their eyes and their mouths fuse with one another. The sight makes my heart drop and it feels as if someone just stabbed it. My throat is dry and it's hard to breathe. I don't even have the strength to look away.

That's not even the worse part. The part that makes me sick. The part that shatters my heart. The part that darkens my world. It's the part she longs for more. The look she gives after they kiss; she looks satisfied and enchanted.

I don't think I could ever forget that expression. I've never seen it before; she's never that happy when she's around me.

If only I had told her sooner.

If only I could do something about this.

If only I could put these feelings aside.

If only I could make her feel that way.

If only.


End file.
